il pleut et je vais pleurer

I'm just going through this emotional episode in my life... I seriously don't know what to expect!
Lately it seems like my friends just left me maybe it is me i don't know
There has been so many times that I wanted to cry but crying alone is not helpful, it doesn't heal..
I know a lot of things that has happen are my fault, I seriously want to do better!
On the other hand being at BYU drives me crazy, don't take me wrong it is great school.. but see all those marriage couples sometimes it makes me sick so time... I hate when people is telling me you are 22 you should be marriage by now you are in BYU... yes I'm in BYU and YES I want to married and Yes I will love to have a family but guess what people?? I haven't found the guy yet. I hate when they say I'm too picky.. yes I do have my standards but is that a bad thing???? I dont want a charming prince. I know that I'm not the princess waiting to be rescued... I'm just LAURA.. the girl with a humble heart, the girl who likes to hold the door for others, the girls who always says thank you to the bus driver, the girl who enjoys seen little kids playing, the girl who calls her mom for counsel, the girl who likes to wear dresses, the girl who will give you a smile even in those days when she is deeply sad, the girl who felt in love so bad that was hurted so bad as well, im the girl who forgives easily, I'm the girl with the cute dog, I'm the girl who tries to write poetry, the girls who dances...
I Know im not perfect I'm forgetful, messy, disorganizate, too dreamy... but overall I want to be better, I have a pure heart, I sure I know how to love!
So now It is raining and I'm gonna cry...